It's late in the afternoon of a long toddler's favorite word, "No." Giving day and you just need a few things, in to little things before tantrums As you approach the check-out occur may actually eliminate some of counter, your toddler begins to the battles. squirm. "Down, down" can be heard throughout the entire store. You say "Please be quiet and hold still." With arched back and stiffened body, your toddler lets out a blood curdling "No No." People give you dirty looks.

Only a child being tortured could make such a noise. Actually your toddler is having a temper tantrum. Perhaps nothing causes parents more frustration than tantrums which are often emotionally and physically exhausting for all involved.

What causes them? Though toddlers may "throw" tantrums because a cookie isn't around a blanket is wrinkled, or a square block won't fit in a round hole ,they "have" tantrums because they get frustrated easily. Their ability cope when they don't get their own way is very limited. They are only now beginning to learn how to manage their own intense feeling .Tantrums most likely occur when they are hungry, exhausted or overexcited.

Here are some helpful hints

Study your child's tantrum. Do you see a pattern? Can you avoid conditions or redirect situations that seem to encourage tantrums?

Only offer real choices. Don't say "Would you like to take your nap?" unless you are prepared to honor your child's choices not to nap. In stead try ," It's naptime now."

Give your child a few minutes notice before you end an activity. This makes "changing gears" easier.

Help your toddler withdraw from an activity or game if you see that it will end in tears.

Makes sure not top overuse your toddlers favorite word, " No", Giving in to little things before tantrums occur may actually eliminate some of the battles.

Set realistic limits but remember that your child is still very young and will not obey all of the time.

Realize that tantrums usually are worse in public. Find a quiet, private place to help your child calm down. Concentrate on what your child must be feeling.

When a tantrum is in progress, you may choose to ignore or hold your child. The choice will depend on each situation. Your relationship with your child is unique and you alone know how much you can tolerate. However, offer your child comfort when the tantrum is over.

Try to remain calm. If you give in to anger, the tantrum is likely to get worse instead of better.

Don't be too upset if you "blow it" and handle the situation poorly. Where haveyou had training that helps you to act calmly when a screaming child smacks you with a piece of toast? Just keep trying.

Some say tantrums are parts of a transition stage between babyhood and childhood. Others recognize tantrums as a valid form of release for young children. Despite what you believe and to a great extent what you do, tantrums will happen. They are a normal part of toddler behaviour. The father of toddler triplets offers the following advice: "Don't buy your kids hard shoes until they reach the age of three!